25) Whatever happened to good old fashioned romance?

I’m currently in London and was struggling for something to write about. I’ll write about London when I get back. I turned to Twitter for suggestions, and in amongst ‘vaginas’ and ‘the future of toys’ was this honest gem:

25a

Interesting, right? Whatever did happen to good old fashioned romance? Or, to put it another way; was good old fashioned romance actually any good?

I’m old enough to remember a time when meeting girls was as simple as putting on your best shirt, rolling out to the club, and remaining on the periphery of the dance floor awkwardly trying to look cool whilst surveying the assembled females dancing around their handbags. If you were lucky one would catch your eye at a time when you were drunk enough – but not too drunk – to have the stones to dance on over and pluck her away from her companions, dance for a bit, and then buy her a Smirnoff Ice. Drunk, horny, you exchange (landline) numbers and the next day or the next make an awkward phone call in the hope that she remembered you at all.

You arrange to meet and days pass between the conversation you had and the date you’re having. You meet, you romance her, you get to know each other, you talk about family, friends, work, etc.. Arrange to meet again and onwards towards a bright future together.

That’s how it used to be. These days, entirely different. There are a number of key reasons why dating today is entirely different. One: mobile phones. Two: internet dating. These things have turned dating and the opposite sex into instantly accessible commodities. But it’s not all bad. Consider;

Mobile phones mean that our access to potential partners is persistent and instantaneous. Text messages, phone calls, FaceTime, all can happen at any time. The ‘getting to know each other stage’ isn’t limited to the first date after the first meeting. It’s a constant process of ‘good morning’ and ‘good night, sweet dreams’ text messages and flirty content in between. You get a much greater opportunity to find out about someone when you can talk to them all the time.

25bBut the main reason why romance/dating has changed is the advent of Internet Dating. Now, we’re no longer restricted to meat markets to meet victims matches. Instead, we can do it online and who isn’t online these days? Plenty of Fish, Tinder, Match, OkCupid, UniformDating, the list goes on. There are so many ways to meet people these days that going out to try and snare a date – in busy modern times – is an inefficient process. Consider;

Go to a bar, choose someone based on looks, interact drunkenly, take them home, one night stand. The morning after realise the mistake you made. This is not the person you were looking for. You have nothing in common. Instead rely upon internet dating. Answer a series of questions and create a profile. Allow a computer to apply a compatibility algorithm to your questions and match you to potential people you will have something in common with. View the suggested profiles, read all about a potential match, have a look at the photos that are attached and decide if you find this person attractive -without the aid of beer goggles. Send a message in a safe(r) environment, strike up a conversation, get to know someone before you choose to spend valuable time on meeting them. How is that bad?

Years ago there was stigma attached to internet dating. These days it’s becoming the norm. And I quite like that. I think it’s cool. I think it’s a much better way of doing romance. I’m all for it.

Whatever happened to good old fashioned romance? It got an upgrade, it became something much bigger than it once was. Embrace the new style of romance because, just like the internet, it’s the future and it’s here to stay.


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