My favourite kind of person

I love those fuckers who want to be angry with everyone, kind of like a modern day, Rage Against the Machine, but end up looking just fucking stupid. It’s even better when those fuckers further their stupid appearance by being hypocritical little fuck holes. Here is a great example of some teen-cunt who thinks he is hot shit on the interweb:

http://www.rantings-of-a-madman.co.uk/index.htm

I was browsing the site this morning to see what further inanities have been produced by the childish minds of the authors and I came across the article on HOW TO MAKE YOUR BLOGS, MYSPACES AND WHATEVER ELSE, LESS SHIT. How ironic. The author of a shitty website telling other shitty website authors how to make their websites less shitty. This should be fun.

Point One

Okay, so first point, yeah. I accept that. It annoys me when I go to a website that has embedded music. But then, I just hit the little “x” button at the top right of the window and it “closes”. No more music. What I don’t do is claim to spend ten stupid minutes searching a stupid website looking for the button to turn off stupid music. That would just be, well, stupid, wouldn’t it?

Point Two

Ooops, I’m confused already and I only just got past the second fucking point of this pointless article (That this is a pointless article about a pointless article is not lost on me). In the first point he bitches about people who use auto start and he bitches about having to spend ten (laughable) minutes looking for the off switch. Here he bitches about those who hide their music. So, it takes him ten minutes to find the off switch on an unhidden music player? Wow, I don’t know what is more stupid; that he spends ten minutes looking for it or that it takes him ten minutes to find it. Holy moly!! It gets better. When he cannot find the music player because it is hidden as he mentions, he spends fifteen minutes looking for it. Jeee-zus, what a fucking retard.

I just hit the little “x” button at the top right of the window and it “closes”. No more music, no more shitty website.

Point Three

Now, this is probably my favourite, because he could easily be talking about the very page I was looking at. We have a stupid cunt who uses orange as a background colour with white text (which as an aside needs to be bigger) for one of the most frustratingly ugly websites in history. I mean, fuck, why not just go with black and white? Or at least use black text instead of white. Further stupidity is thrown up by the title of this section. “3. At least make your colours work together.” He has red on orange and is complaining about colours which ‘don’t work’. Could the irony be sweeter? Could it?

Point Four

Ahh, archiving. That thing that most ‘blogs do auto-fucking-matically as posts get older. Spastic.

Point Five

The links in this are all to MySpace accounts. Everyone knows that MySpace accounts are run by fucking losers. Anyone who goes to MySpace expecting to see anything other than a cluttered, fucked up, waste of time, is an idiot. What’s worse, in my opinion, is people who have websites that are privately hosted, and are too fucking stupid to set up the frames correctly. Most people are past the point of using 800 x 600 displays. Most people have moved past boxy shitty little monitors. Not this cunt. The main table of the webpage is just 590px. Fucking waste of space (the duality of this statement is duly noted and recognised).

The point is, good site design starts at home. Go here, cock-block.

Point Six

Buy a better computer, you tight motherfucker.

Point Seven

Get faster internet, you tight motherfucker.

Point Eight

The first sentence of this could have formed the basis of the entire article. Stop blogging, Because, to be honest, nobody reads them. Okay, except our writer here wants to read the bullshit of MySpacers so much that he spends ten minutes searching for unhidden music players and fifteen minutes searching for hidden ones. That is some dedication.

People will write what they wish to, and as often as they wish to. Isn’t that the purpose of a ‘blog? To write down what you want? Advice noted, but fuck you. If you do not want to read what is written just hit the little “x” button at the top right of the window and it “closes”. No more complaining about some guy from the other side of the planet going for a dump, just less MySpace and more porn.

Point Nine

Get over here and castrate me, motherfucker, I made a quiz just for you: Quizilla Rox!

I’ll tell you what I hate. It’s people who type in capitals in order to get their point across because their words are not enough. It doesn’t look good, it doesn’t look clever, and it does not make you look like an internet tough guy. It simply makes you look like a stupid cunt that would spend fifteen minutes searching a MySpace for a fucking off switch. Tit.

Point Ten

It’s ‘barley’ an effort? I guess it doesn’t matter ‘weather’ I point out that you are an uneducated buffoon now or later, right? I just love it when a fucking upstart fills a rant about spelling with spelling errors. I don’t hate this kind of thing, I don’t hate people who can’t spell, but I wish to have fantastic animal sex with the ones who try to be clever and are not. Fucking tit.


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