Oh…. Fuck. Pt. 1

‘The shit and the fan matched co-ordinates in spectacular fashion.’

It’s finally done and I’m not sure how I feel about it. Relieved, pissed, angry, upset, disappointed, elated… All these differing emotions scurrying around in my skull and all because of a measly £50.

Terry, my housemate and best friend has been with Heidi for about two months now and they’ve reached that point in a relationship where they want to spend every second of every day with each other (Sarah and I passed that point months ago ;)). She’s 19, lives at home. The only place they have where they can be together is here, this house, my house and home. Including today, Heidi will have been here overnight for five of the last six days. Does that not sound like a ‘she’s moved in’ situation?

Now, let me just clear something up: I don’t have a problem with Heidi as a person. I don’t think much of her, she isn’t my type of girl. Far too vacuous and immature for my tastes, but whatever floats your boat. She makes him happy so she get’s a thumbs up from me. I don’t have an issue with her and I don’t have an issue with her being here. What I have an issue with is that someone else has moved in to my home without prior consulation or permission. It started as one or two nights, and now she’s here more often than I am!

So, this is how it went down:

I was pissed off. I’ve had a shitty day and had to deal with some dumb-cunt bitch who wouldn’t take, “Fuck off, I don’t care, you’re not my FUCKING problem!” as an answer. Things haven’t been great with the Heidi situation so I figured it would be a good idea if the four of us (Terry, Heidi, Sarah & I) could spend a bit of time together. Perhaps I would learn to like her if I figured out if anything lingered in her apparently vapid skull. I asked Sarah if she’d stay over on Saturday night and she agreed, so I sent the following text message to Terry. Now, I know text is not the best method of communication, but I was at work so couldn’t just log out and call. Texting means I can (pretend to) keep working and communicate externally:

Sarah is staying over on Saturday night. We’re not doing anything special, just a dvd and pizza. You are welcome to join us. It might be a good chance to get to know each other, if you know what I mean.

The response I got was less than satisfactory. Yeah, I know that it shouldn’t have pissed me off, but I had decided to make an effort and it had been rejected. I’m only human and I hate rejection:

Sounds good but already have plans Heidi over tonight bout 8if ok? we stayin at hers from sat cos her mam goin away4 week so b out of ya way mate. Catch ya later

She staying over again?

Is that a problem? this is the last time for bout 4weeks mate… Sorry

Fuck it. I make a fucking effort and I get an ‘it’s not convenient to do this’, but of course it’s convenient for her to stay over AGAIN. For the FIFTH FUCKING TIME IN A WEEK. I’m sick of being treated like a muppet, like a doormat, something to get stepped on. I feel like he’s taking the piss out of me, but the worst thing is he doesn’t even know he’s doing it. Perhaps I shouldn’t have responded this way, perhaps I shouldn’t have taken it as a personal affront, but this was the last straw. The one that bent the camel over a fucked it from behind:

She spends more time at our house than I do. I’m gonna have to increase the rent. I’m paying for her to stay at my house, it’s not acceptable. I have no problem with Heidi staying over but it is starting to cost me more so from july the rent will be 200 a month. Sorry to do this but I have no option.

Now, I feel this is justified. She is L I V I N G here. It’s another body under this roof that I pay in excess of £600 a month to maintain. Terry pays me £150 a month, that’s the lot. Nothing more. I pay for everything and I’m compensated very little. Yeah, we agreed on that amount when he moved in in September last year, but situations change. I don’t think it is unreasonable to expect more money when there are more people living in my house.

How is it costin u more? I watch the tv use the fire n cook exactly the same when Heidi not around as i do when she is…Im not usin anymore resources at all

No, but she is. Gas. Electric. Water. Do you use hair curlers? Do I? Ironing. The list goes on. Text isn’t right for this. I’ll talk to you some other time…

Can we talk when i get in?


This isn’t how I wanted it to happen. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!! The one thing I wanted to avoid was conflict. We have to live together and we’re good friends. Terry and I have never had an argument or crossed word before. I didn’t want to start now. But, I’d made my bed and I had to lie in it. Shit.

To be concluded…


5 thoughts on “Oh…. Fuck. Pt. 1

  1. I think it’s justified, though. If she lives in your house then she has to pay, simple as that.

    I don’t see any possible reason your housemate has to not pay more rent if she stays there, so I would like to hear what he could possibly say in defence.

    Good luck.



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