The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

I took Sarah to the cinema tonight to see The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and thought I’d spare you the pain and utter disappointment of seeing this complete pile of utter bullshit. Being a huge fan of the books, I was very interested to see what they had done with the transition to celluloid. Douglas Adams must be turning in his grave as this modern classic was raped, as some expected, by the movie version.

The problem with book to movie translations is that, quite simply, books require you to have an imagination. You read the words and create your own pictures and version of events in your head. The Characters take on a life and appearance that you create for them, prompted by the words you are reading. When a book becomes a movie, that is lost. Your version is replaced by another’s vision. The characters you animate with your mind become animated by actors and script writers. What happened here is that my carefully constructed version of The Guide was torn up, stamped on, burned, crucified and skull-fucked into non-existence by this seriously dire effort.

If you are a fan of the books to the extent where you return to them time and again and they remain fresh, original, superb; do not go see this movie. Did you hear me? DO NOT GO SEE THIS PILE OF SHIT!

Just don’t do it. If you one with masochistic tendancies or a burning curiosity to see this monstrous waste of time, them don’t come back here and complain that you were not warned. You were warned. DO NOT GO SEE THIS PILE OF SHIT!

Five things to hate about this movie:

– Arthur Dent to too young, too clean and too alert.

– Ford Prefect isn’t ‘off the wall’ enough (and is black, which is a minor grumble).

– Zaphod Beeblebrox displays just one head at a time, rather than having them side by side as described in the books.

– The Vogons aren’t quite nasty enough.

– Marvin the Paranoid Android seems too clean and futuristic.

Two things to love about this movie:

The Episode III trailer.

The War of the Worlds trailer.

Watch the trailers supplied above and save yourself from wasting your time going to see this.

Of course, there is another side to this. Many people have not read the books and those people may enjoy the movie. They will not have illusions waiting to be shattered or a connection to the story telling process. To those people I say, but the damn book. Don’t go see this tripe.

DT


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